Luckily, the bus was late

Had a great barny just now with a driver who parked in the bus stop outside the Thorn.

I said: Excuse me, you’re parking in a bus stop. A bus is coming right this minute, so can you please park anywhere else in Mistley?

He said: I’m just posting a letter… And proceeded to do so.

I said: That’s really inconsiderate!

Whereupon he f’ed and blinded (that doesn’t at all resemble English when it’s written down…), and got back in his car.

Whereupon I – as is my wont – tapped the back of his car with my walking stick.

Whereupon he got out and said (rhetorically, because he knew that I had): Did you just hit my car? (Said as if I’d hit the Virgin Mary…)

I said, proudly: Yes!

He said: There better not be a f***ing mark… (There wasn’t, regrettably…)

I said: Well, you were doing an illegal park in a bus stop, and are harassing a disabled man who’s just trying to catch a bus. If you think we should call the police, I’m with you…

Whereupon he got back in his car and roared off (on the wrong side of the road, of course).

The window cleaner, who’d been up his ladder and had observed the whole thing, said, shaking his head: BMW driver…!

Luckily, the bus was late…


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I had a stroke on July 26th, 2013. I was a screenwriter. Don’t do that anymore. But have found another way to write.

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